Tech Hype
Posted on August 16, 2007
Filed Under Opinion, Rants, Technology |
“XOHM is official, is coming, is already overrated” is what I read this morning. “the internet is on the verge of another revolution” is what marketing people are saying. XOHM is Sprint’s (a mobile provider in the States) WiMax service, which has had its fair share of hype.
I’m actually not hugely interested in this though, what I am interested in is the refusal to just accept new technology and wait for it to grow before telling people we’re about to reach new heights of being human. So, in memory of tech that has been overhyped, here is my top 5.
WAP
“The internet on your phone”, “Now you can surf from anywhere”. Oh how wrong. I was excited by WAP (Wireless Application Protocol) as it would bring data to your mobile. But it was never really meant to be the internet. These were the days before GPRS, and even colour screens. No, WAP was for data only. Kind of like teletext. What’s happened in the news? How are my stocks doing? It’s late, where’s my nearest cash machine, kebab house or cab rank? All of these could be answered (albeit quite expensively and being charged for every second you’re online), but images and video were a long way away.
Most people didn’t really use WAP. It was a big flop in peoples’ minds, but basically. If it had been just a feature on a phone. It would have been used a bit. Not much, but would have never been a flop as it really wasn’t that amazing.
3G
This one is just funny. Licenses sold for £21 billion in total. In fact I think the government used it to pay of some of the national debt, it’s the GDP of a small to mid-sized country, I think. “Video on your phone”, a very high data connection so you can surf at broadband speeds (which wasn’t yet fully mainstream when this was being hyped). Problem is, again, it’s a nice to have, but who’s going to pay 50p for a video call? I love tech, but I have to admit, I have made 2 calls, last all of about 1 minute. If I’ve had reception. Most people still use 2G. Or, as marketing has started calling it “2.5G” because data speeds are higher because of GPRS.
Bring prices down, and people might use it more, but I doubt it would take over the normal good ol’ phone call, just the way Mr Alexander Graham Bell had done all those years ago.
Segway Transporter
HAHA! I love this one. Steve Jobs even waded into this “Cities will be designed and built round this”. Amazing. The day came, books and articles had been written as to what this could be. Could it be a contraption? A gadget? A theory? There were even talks of it being teleportation. I waited, baited breath. This thing, codenamed “IT”.
Then it came, a 2 wheel vehicle which basically makes humankind more lazy. The Segway, “I used to have to walk before I got one of these”. Ok, it was quite cool, it balances on its own, and tipping the thing forward makes it move making it difficult to fall off, this main feature caused the first batch to be recalled as they malfunctioned and people, well, fell off. I think it is available in the States more, but I think a lot of other countries still like walks in the park, and, their legs.
It’s not teleportation, never let people have a blank canvas to think on, because it will, ultimately, prove a disappointment. Some even thought this was a cover up before the real product was unveiled. I’m still waiting.
Dial Up Internet
I avoided the use of just “internet” as, well, there is no argument to how much that has taken off. But When we first had it, we were told “it’s the information superhighway”, “soon you’ll be able to upload your mind”. Marketing had a job lot of coke that day. The few first years of the internet were tragic. You’d wait for an image to download for about 30 seconds. The idea of downloading sound and video was not even a thought unless you felt rich and/or BT had forgotten about billing you. Information superhighway indeed.
MMS
First you had SMS, now, ladies and gentlemen. We have MMS, Multimedia Messaging Service. WOW! Ok, this has kind of taken off, a bit, kind of, sort of, but phone companies just don’t seem to get it. SMS is popular because it is a simple, cheap way of getting in touch to say “I’m running 5 minutes late”. It took off more as kids opted to not talk to each other, and 10p isn’t too much (it used to be 4p when T-mobile, then One2one first released it). MMS was to do what SMS did, but better. Photos being sent, videos, hell, even my soul if it’ll fit onto my tiny device. “How much” we all cried, “50p” they said. 50p? thanks board room. Thanks guy in a massive house already making the bag overcharging for SMS and calls. No, no one really wanted to pay 50p. It’s a chocolate bar. 4 of these and we can buy a toilet for an African village. So, the operators, still upset by the 3G thing decided, “ok, 25p”. Better, but still, it’s never going to be SMS because when I send “going to be late” or “how are you?”, what photo will I send? And is it worth 25p for?
I might use it sometimes, if at a festival, you can make your friends jealous by taking photos (I have about 10 friends, so that £2.50, but hell, I’ll be drunk).
So, in short. These things are actually all quite cool. Well, not dial up internet, but that’s not all but defunct. But most are just over hyped. The human race hasn’t really changed because of them, but they’ve had their place. The reason is that marketing. Good old marketing, decided to kill all these babies before they were born, simply because they either
a. Don’t understand it.
b. Are bored.
Sad really.
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